Yesterday, after the new KaleidoSoul site was finally up and really running… I breathed a huge sigh of relief and release.  I felt the power of this huge transition in my life and in the life of this website which has been such a big part of my life for the last 5 years.  FIVE YEARS!

I sat and thought about that for a moment.

And then I just felt the inner urge to do a reading with my Deck, so I separated my cards into the four suits, and I asked this question:

Who has something to say about this momentous occasion of leaving SBI (the old web platform) behind and celebrating the new KaleidoSoul?

I drew one card from each suit and here is what each one said to me:

Maggie, Sad Woman (Committee Suit)–

Woman: I am the one who is sad. I am the one who is taking time to say goodbye to the old KaleidoSoul and the old way of doing things. I am the one who is looking back, behind, to the way it was.

Boy: I am the one who is facing the rising sun, forward, ahead. I am the one who is ready to surprise you with great love.

Butterfly: I am the one who has come out of the cocoon into full-blown beauty. I am the one who balances and swings between the past and the future.  I am the one who stays in the present.

Our message for you on this special day is this: It is perfectly ok to feel sad while saying good-bye.  This is the end of an era for you. It is also ok to feel happy and loving and excited about the future at the same time.  Just remember to balance yourself in the present moment and all will be well.  It is the end of an era and the beginning of a new era and you can balance all that that entails by staying present to what IS.

Fran, my former therapist

I am the one who encouraged you through the creation of the first KaleidoSoul! I am the one who taught you about feeling your feelings, about flying, about transformation, about going within, about self-acceptance.

My message for you on this special day is this: Congratulations and blessings. Take some time today to absorb what you have done, created, given to the world. Stand still, pause and bask in the glow of Spirit.  Know that all is well.

Little Brown Bird, Heart Chakra (Companions Suit)

I am the one who is building a nest in your heart. I am the one whom you tamed so I sit on your hand and sing to you. I am the one who brings you such inner peace and sweet joy.

My message for your on this day of celebration is this: Keep your heart open and expansive.  Practice your yoga breathing.  Watch me as I build this nest of self-acceptance and trust in your heart. And know that you are building a nest for others of rest and safety … that is what KaleidoSoul is to the world, you know1

Crone (Council Suit)

I am the one who is old and wise, who has created wrinkles on my face from laughter and joy. I am the one who is happy and content with myself.  I am the one who is still creating colorful things even though I am old. I am the one who doesn’t care if birds perch on my head.

My message for your today is this- Your website is a testimony to authenticity and inner wisdom, and that tickles me to pieces!  My crone energy is guiding you forward…you continually are becoming… you are moving through your years with color and grace and authenticity. I bless your work!

MY OBSERVATIONS AFTER THE READING

What I noticed about the cards I drew as I laid them out side by side and looked at them as a group:

1. Two birds and two butterflies and two hearts (not a coincidence, I think!)

2. For me, the birds are symbols of nesting, hatching, and flight.

3. For me, the butterflies are symbols of transformation, metamorphosis, new beginnings.

4. Also, butterfly is my 3rd chakra animal companion, and bird is my 4th chakra animal companion, which brings into my mind the Solar and Heart Chakras which speak to me about authenticity, radiance, unconditional self love and radical acceptance.

I feel very affirmed and blessed after doing this reading!

Another beautiful reminder that I always get exactly what I need when we ask my Deck a question and wait for the response!

I drew two cards yesterday as part of my Daily Readings ritual with my SoulCollage^® Deck.  I wasn’t specifically asking for guidance in the New Year, but look what wisdom I unveiled!

NOT ENOUGH

I am the one who was led to believe I wasn’t enough.

Not pretty enough, not smart enough, not good enough, not sexy enough, not loving enough. 

I am the one who was locked into that belief for many, many years.

I am the one who hid for decades behind masks.

I am the one who felt so ashamed all the time. 

My message for you today is this- please take care of me. 

Remind me that I AM enough. Shelter me.  Hold me.  Feed me with joy and with present moment awareness of Source.  My energy no longer serves you.  Remember that.  Don’t let me start believing the old stories again.

So I was a little annoyed at first because I drew such a DARK card to start of my New Year.

But…. look at what I drew for my second card:

METAMORPHOSIS

I am the one who is bursting forth into butterfly beauty. 

I am the one who is transforming into my truest divine nature. 

I am the one who shatters the beliefs and lessons of the past. 

I am the one sailing, flying, on a sea of jeweled green heart-growth. 

I am the one who smiles, looking inward.

I am the one who is leaving behind the musty coccoon. 

I am the one who is unfolding my wings, leaving the past behind.

I’ve been getting back into the habit of daily (ok, ALMOST daily) SoulCollage^® readings with my cards. Just a few minutes in the morning, sometimes longer.  I’m really enjoying the gift this practice has of centering me and connecting me back to my wisest, clearest Self.

Today, I drew these two cards:

I Can Do It Myself- Committee Suit-

I am the one who is bent under the weight of this over-full tray I am holding.  I am the one who is gripping onto the try tightly.  I am the one who thinks I have to do this by myself. I am the one who is doing this alone come hell or high water.

My message for you today is this: I am tired of carrying this heavy tray all by myself.  Please help me?  I have been taught that I have to do all of the hard stuff alone.  But is that really true?  Can you please, please help me???

Yes, I will help you, dear one.

Thank you for trying to carry all of my burdens for so long.  It’s time to set down the tray. There are others on our team who will help us to carry what needs to be carried.

Thank you!  It is really hard-wired inside of me, this thing about having to do it all myself and all the time, you know? I just need some help in breaking that hard-wiring.  I just need your patience, and I need you to help me to make different choices so I can understand, really understand, that I am not alone.

Buddha/curtains (Keys to Joy suit)-

I am the one who is sitting alone in the light-filled window, only curtains stirred by the breeze.  I am the one who is sitting still and quietly and trusting that I don’t have to DO anything to be loved and held in love by Spirit.  I am the one who is meditating, praying, still.  I am the one who is at home in my body.

I am the one who is at peace with myself.  My message for you today is this- sit still, now.  You are almost done with your journal entry for today, yes?  Go in your Quiet Room and sit on the chair with your prayer shawl and close your eyes.  Be still. Let go of everything that you have been struggling to carry.  Let the world go on without your struggle, your insistence on doing, doing, doing.

And while writing about them, I looked at them side by side and saw such amazing similarities and differences, that I really had a wonderful “inner surprise!”

I was drawn to how similar the cards are in color and tone… the grays and whites, the neutral tones, the almost blandness of each of them.  But the huge difference is the energy in each one. The first card seemed to be showing me the energy that’s been controlling me these past several months, and what I receive from the second card is the energy that I would like to invite more of into my life!