This is the newest card I’ve made, sometime in September at a SoulCollage^® Workshop I was leading at my home.  It’s interesting because I’m not usually drawn to images like the model in the foreground, but I was drawn to her that day and still am now.

I held her up against many background images before settling on this one, which also seemed equally powerful to me.

When I started to do the interpretation, I couldn’t decide which “voice” on the card was the loudest for me, so I did some I Am The One Who‘s from BOTH of them!  And then I did a short dialogue that was really an eye-opener for me.  Here goes:

#1- Woman with the flower: I am the one who is strutting my stuff. I am the one who is whipping around this fragile flower and not even worried that it might break.  I am the one who is immensely confident.  I am the one who does what I want, whatever the HELL I want and everyone else be damned.

#2- Woman in background:  I am the one who is laying back. My eyes are half open. I am the one whose face is half scratched off. I am the one who has a glowing flower over my head, in my crown chakra.  I am the one who is almost asleep, or almost awake… and I don’t know which. #1- Hey you… girlfriend!  WAKE UP ALREADY!!! It’s time to rise and shine and smell the flowers.  Wake up to the Divine, do you hear me girl??? #2- Oh, I don’t know.  I’m kindof wanting to go back to sleep.  Do I HAVE to wake up?  This is very restful like this. #1- YES, Damnit!  Wake up.  WAKE UP.  You have to wake up now.  You’ve had a nice long rest.  Now open your eyes. #2- Do you mean metaphorically or in real time and space? #1- Oh for God’s sakes… stop being in your head all the time… just WAKE UP!!!

A few days ago, Imelda posted her New Year’s SoulCollage^® Reading on her wonderful blog, SoulFragments, so I decided to do a similar reading.  I asked the question, Which energies in my deck have lessons to teach me and will be my Guides for the coming year?

Then I sorted my cards into 6 piles.  Four of the piles were the SoulCollage^® Suits: Committee, Community, Companions, and Council.  One pile was of a suit I created just for my deck: Keys to Joy.  And the last pile was of the cards in my deck whose meanings are unknown to me.

I lit a candle and put on some soft music, placed my Source card in
the center of the desk, and then thoughtfully and quietly chose one
card from each of the piles, without looking at the fronts of the cards. I removed the remaining cards, and turned
over the cards I had chosen one at a time.  Below you will find the
results of my readings- the images of the SoulCollage^® cards I
“randomly” drew, plus what each card had to say to me about how it
could be my guide this year.

Committee Suit Card: I Can Do It Myself! I
am the one who struggles under the weight of too many projects.  I am
the one who doesn’t like/want to ask for help.  My message for you this
new year is this: I don’t want to keep doing everything myself… this
is taking its toll on my body, mind and spirit.  I’ve been really
strong in your life because I haven’t wanted to trust, to be vulnerable
which is what it takes to ask for help.  My lesson for you this year is
for you to notice when your fears are keeping you from asking for
help… and to let yourself free yourself from my tyrrany.

Community Suit Card: My Friend Rita I
am the one who is warm and wise, who loves and supports you just as

you
are.  I am the one who is creative and colorful and not afraid to look
people in the eye.  My message for you this year is this: Believe in
yourself!  I am one of the ones you can ask for help. You know I will
be there for you no matter what. 

Council Suit Card: Father Archetype I am the one who is male and strong but also unconditionally loving and nurturing.  I am the one who has drawn you to positive fatherly figures throughout your life: your Dad, Dr. Pond, Randy, Doug, Jeff…  My message for you this year is this: Spend some time in your meditation time with each of the men I mentioned above.  Allow their love and strength to nurture and support you even now.  They can still be your teachers, even though most of them are no longer “with” you… you are still connected to them.

Companions Suit Card: 4th Chakra Little Brown Bird I am the one who builds a nest in your heart of love and forgiveness.  I am the one whose nest-building/heart-work is a work in continuous process.  I am the one who teaches you love, compassion, breath, and forgiveness.  My message for you in 2008 is this: It is safe now to open your heart!  The past is the past.  Now is all you have.  Love freely now, and more will be given to you.

Keys to Joy Suit: Taking Care of My Body I am the one who loves to dance, swim, and move my body in healthy, energizing ways.  I am the one who eats healthy, nourishing foods.  I am the one who loves and takes care of my body.  My message for you this year is this: Keep on going to the Y and walking and exercising, and listening to your body for hunger/fullness signals.  It is good for your body, mind and spirit!

Unknown Cards: Treasure Girl

I am the one who lies back in a bed of beads and collage embellishments and sparkly fun things.  I am the one with lace and pearls and buttons and glittery treasures all around me.  I am the one who isn’t afraid to roll around in the “good stuff.”  My message for you this year is this: Lean back and savor your life…ALL of it!  It is all yours, enjoy it!  Claim each treasure as your own!

NOTE: I am going to reduce the cards in size and place them into a small (4 x
6) photo album along with the writing I did on each one. I will carry
this album in my purse all year long and take it out to look at, to
remember, when I am stuck in traffic or waiting at the dentist’s
office…etc.

When I was laid up in bed in January with bronchitis, I started watching two hours of Judging Amy reruns every day, and somehow I got hooked.  After a few weeks, I couldn’t justify lying in bed until 2 in the afternoon, so I began taping the episodes every day, and then watching them at night or catching up in weekend marathons. If you don’t know this show, it’s about a Juvenile Court judge (Amy) who is in her 30’s and lives at home with her mother (Maxine) who is a social worker, and her 10 year old daughter (Lauren).  While I found the courtroom scenes, the social work stories, and the love triangles intriguing, I still wasn’t quite sure why I was so drawn to this show.

A few of my inner voices were intent on judging me for this prime time obsession.  Can’t you find something better to do with your time?  This is ridiculous.  You are becoming a tv junkie.  How juvenile are you anyway?

But I felt, somewhere deep within me, the need to keep watching it.  It felt like this was more than a tv show to me somehow, and I decided to trust these inner nudges to keep watching.  I decided to trust my intuition, and to develop a “wait and see” attitude.  So I kept watching.

A few weeks ago I did a SoulCollage^® reading where I asked a question of my deck, and then drew 4 cards.  Interestingly enough, THREE of those FOUR cards had something to do with the topic of mothering.

As I continued the reading (writing some I AM THE ONE WHO’s for each card, and then letting each card speak to me about my question), I came across a startling realization!  Here is part of what the Divine Mother card “said” to me as part of this reading: Good, truly deep mothering is not something that you ever received, although your mom’s intentions were good.  And so you are now struggling with the process of inner mothering. I can help you with this.  Watching Judging Amy is helping you too. Do not brush it aside as “just a tv show…”  You  are receiving much wisdom and insight from watching Maxine and Amy, and Amy with Lauren…. Embrace what you are learning there. Be glad of it and grateful for it too. I was completely startled to see those words coming from my hand, and from the voice of the Divine Mother!  Of course!  It became clear to me as soon as I wrote those words.  Crystal clear.  Now I watch the show with a bit more of a focus, and the lessons I am learning on what it means to mother myself are coming faster than I can write them down!  (Later, I also added an image of Amy and her mother onto my Inner Mother card. They are the ones in black and white near the center. >>>>>)

I love telling this story about myself because it’s a clear reminder of how I can and should always trust my intuition…. my soul truly DOES know what will serve me best.. all I have to do is listen and follow!

PS You can comment on this post by clicking on the word “comment” below.  I’d love to hear what you have to share about this topic.

Thank you for stopping by…  I’m glad you’re here.  My intention for this blog is that it will be a center for replenishment, centering, and creative inspiration for you as you begin/continue on your journey with SoulCollage.