When you come right down to it,
all you have is yourself.
Yourself is a sun
with a thousand rays in your belly.
The rest is nothing.
~ Pablo Picasso

When I think of my Self as a bright glowing sun with a thousand rays in my belly, I literally get goosebumps (in spite of the warmth of that image).  Then I close my eyes and imagine that sun as the whole of me, filling me and holding me with its essential power and light.  I see this “sun” as the solar star that is the center of our universe; I also see it as Spirit, that universal energy that gives me breath and life.

Each of these “thousand rays” represents a card in my SoulCollage® deck: an inner voice (shadowed or bright), a loved one in my community, an animal guide, a spiritual guide or archetype that has always been active in my life. Each of these rays of light emanates from my center, my true authentic self, my SoulEssence… that spark of Spirit that lives within each of us, uniquely our own.

These thousand rays lighten and lift me until I’m soaring high above all the old definitions of myself, all my outgrown ways of being.

Picasso is right. The rest is nothing.

I am all that I have.  Myself, a shining light of wonder, shadow, passion, and heat… and a thousand rays of that passion radiating from my center out into the world.

Reflection Time:

Are you allowing the sun (Spirit, Source, God, the Divine, the Universe) to carry you today?

What old definitions and stories are you getting ready to leave behind? Which definitions and stories have you already let go of?

How can you express this sun-self of yours?  Find some images and make a SoulCollage®

card. Get out your fingerpaints or crayons. Write a poem.  Share your response by using the “contact” button at the top of this page.

Throughout my life, I’ve never been one to wonder “Who were my ancestors?” or “What are their stories?” Maybe I’ve been a bit too self-involved.  Or maybe it’s because both of my parents came from dysfunctional families that were touched by the disease of alcoholism and therefore, they never talked about their parents (very much) or grandparents (hardly ever).  Why would I be curious about people who obviously caused harm to their families, and more specifically, to my own mother and father?

But lately I’ve been rethinking this whole topic.  Thanks to Audrey Chowdhury, a SoulCollage Facilitator in Wisconsin, who has written a thought-provoking and creativity-inspiring book, Ancestral Impressions: Exploring Your Ancestry through Creativity, Imagery, and Intuition.  Don’t let the sepia-toned cover fool you- this is a powerful book that is popping with imagination, color, and creativity.

Because of Audrey’s teachings on this topic, I was reminded of a SoulCollage® card I made a while back that spoke to me from my collective ancestors’ voice. This card and its story can be found here:  Soul Songs Newsletter October 2017

Also as a result of Audrey’s book, I have been led to make some new cards honoring my ancestors, both known and unknown.

I made this card (right) to honor my mother’s parents. Their names were Gus and Alice. Grandma Alice died when I was 22, and she was close to our family. Grandpa died when I was 5, and I have no memory of him. But after reading Audrey’s book, I came to realize that their story is an important part of my own story and I felt led to make a card honoring their relationship.

Although my mother and grandmother hardly ever spoke of my grandfather (he was an alcoholic), I was happy to find  some pictures of them when they were very young and obviously in love, and then added a photo of them in their older years, holding hands. The addition of the Indra’s Net image and pale pink flower petals speak to me of being held in the Oneness of all beings.

Who are you?
We are the ones who gave birth to your mother. We are your grandparents. We are the ones who loved you when you were born, and now love you from another space and timeless time. We are the ones who were in love and whose marriage lasted “til death do us part.” We are the ones who lived through the Depression. We are the ones who knew what hard times were. We are the ones who survived. We are the ones who are so proud of you.

What do you want from me?
We want you to know that even though we both died when you were young, we are still connected through the “nettedness” (Seena’s word!) of all beings.  Our lights shine bright on Indra’s Net, as does yours. We want you to know that we are happy that you have connected with us here. We want you to continue learning about our stories.  We want you to know that you are loved.

I made this SoulCollage® card (left) to honor my parents as a couple, along with what I am calling my “unknown ancestors.”  I found the photo of my parents on their wedding day with their mothers beside them, and then added a variety of photos of other ancestors from both of their families. Some I can identify, and some I cannot.

Who are you?
We are the ones who came before you. We are your parents and your parents’ parents’ and the parents of them as well. We are the ones who are your lineage. We are the ones who bear your roots. We are the ones whose DNA matches yours. We are family, even though you do not know all our names. We are the ones who are, and have always been, a part of your life.

What do you have to give me?
We give you the knowledge that you are not alone. We give you your physical characteristics, your intellectual curiosity, your creativity. We give you the will and the capacity to survive difficult situations. We give you our love.

This is an excellent example of how a “mystery card” can slowly reveal itself by asking “Who are you?” and then letting it speak the first several responses very descriptively. Sometimes that will warm up the right brain so that intuition can kick right in.

Who are you?

I am the one who is balancing on a white stool.  I am the one who is balancing in the middle of a long narrow hallway.  I am the one who is in an ancient place. I am the one who is looking ahead.

I am the one who knows exactly how to position my arms and legs and head in order to balance on this tiny stool. I am the one who is focused and strong.

I am the one who has chosen to pause here and rest in this posture of balance and strength instead of continuing down the hallway to see what is through the door.

What do you have to give me?

I give you the strength and the will to stay focused. I give you balance and poise. I give you permission to pause on your journey and get in touch with your power and stillness instead of rushing ahead.

What wisdom do you have for me about refueling for my journey?

What I say about refueling is that from time to time you need to pause and be still in order to give yourself more balance.

More wisdom for  you about this is that yoga class is a good practice for you for refueling. YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK and you might consider taking something a little more challenging than the “gentle yoga” classes you’ve been going to, once in a while.

I love having this card in my deck to remind me to notice and actively collect blessings all year long, not just at Thanksgiving and the holidays.

Who are you?

I am the one who stands in a field of flowers. I am the one who gladly picks the flowers and gathers them into my big bowl.

I am the one who is grateful for every blessing that comes my way, every single one.

I am the one who notices my blessings, who takes time to savor each one as I gather it in.

The first version of this card held just the queen and the princess, but after a few years, it became clear to me that its energy would be/feel more balanced with a little bit of male royalty, so I added the king. They speak as one voice now, my Inner Royalty Triumverate.

Who are you?

We are the ones who rule your Inner Kingdom.  We are a healthy yet powerful governing force within you.  We are male-female-child.  We are a balanced royal trio representing rationality, intuition, truth, and playfulness.

We are kind and fair as we work with all your inner parts.

Our message to you today is this- allow your inner parts to relax and support you.